Hi Belén, This is a wonderful and compelling piece of writing. I really like that combination of story and letter, and although you said you only want to write short stories :) this, of course, feels like it could be part of a much bigger project. What would señor Andrade's response be? And the next letter, and the next? I love that combination of fact and fiction – or what at least appears to be fact and fiction, because there's a photograph to prove that Los Vitaliano did exist! I like that tender moment when the teacher asks his wife to get dry clothes for the boy – and doesn't turn out to be so cruel as to let him sit there in wet clothes. You also create a lovely tension when the brother is left by the fountain. There's real suspense that something might happen to him. I like the way you set that up. One little suggestion I have is to maybe have the boy wearing a hat, or something that links to the "introduction" to the letter, where the mother is making a hat. A little subtle connect can be very satisfying, for the writer as well as the reader.
I hope you'll continue to expand this letter and write more of them! Thanks for sharing the story and the photograph, and for participating in the course. I'm going to read the other pieces of writing you've shared in the forums. Take care, and keep writing! Un abrazo desde Madrid!
@shaun_levin Hi Shaun, thank you very much for your time and for your words. I have loved the course. Really. How glad I was that I chose it. Your tips for finding inspiration have been very helpful. This story tells a true anecdote that happened to my father when he was little. My parents and my uncles, especially in summer, spend their lives telling stories like this and I would love to be able to write them all, because it fascinates me to listen to them. The introduction with needles and wool came from the topic you suggested to write about one of our hobbies. The idea of sitting down to knit seemed to suit him well as a connecting point between different stories. The moment and the situation in which I remember them and I am shaping them, like a blanket ... At the same time that one of my children asks me about them. My daughter is a bit like me and really enjoys stories from the last century. Who knows? Maybe one day I can write a book with all these anecdotes ... Thank you very much for everything. Receive a warm greeting, Belén.
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displayname3306830
Professor PlusHi Belén, This is a wonderful and compelling piece of writing. I really like that combination of story and letter, and although you said you only want to write short stories :) this, of course, feels like it could be part of a much bigger project. What would señor Andrade's response be? And the next letter, and the next? I love that combination of fact and fiction – or what at least appears to be fact and fiction, because there's a photograph to prove that Los Vitaliano did exist! I like that tender moment when the teacher asks his wife to get dry clothes for the boy – and doesn't turn out to be so cruel as to let him sit there in wet clothes. You also create a lovely tension when the brother is left by the fountain. There's real suspense that something might happen to him. I like the way you set that up. One little suggestion I have is to maybe have the boy wearing a hat, or something that links to the "introduction" to the letter, where the mother is making a hat. A little subtle connect can be very satisfying, for the writer as well as the reader.
I hope you'll continue to expand this letter and write more of them! Thanks for sharing the story and the photograph, and for participating in the course. I'm going to read the other pieces of writing you've shared in the forums. Take care, and keep writing! Un abrazo desde Madrid!
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@shaun_levin Hi Shaun, thank you very much for your time and for your words. I have loved the course. Really. How glad I was that I chose it. Your tips for finding inspiration have been very helpful. This story tells a true anecdote that happened to my father when he was little. My parents and my uncles, especially in summer, spend their lives telling stories like this and I would love to be able to write them all, because it fascinates me to listen to them. The introduction with needles and wool came from the topic you suggested to write about one of our hobbies. The idea of sitting down to knit seemed to suit him well as a connecting point between different stories. The moment and the situation in which I remember them and I am shaping them, like a blanket ... At the same time that one of my children asks me about them. My daughter is a bit like me and really enjoys stories from the last century. Who knows? Maybe one day I can write a book with all these anecdotes ... Thank you very much for everything. Receive a warm greeting, Belén.
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Professor Plus@beroals You're very welcome. I hope there'll be more to read soon :)
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