@aolivver Hi Júlia, I enjoyed reading the story. It has the flavour of an urban legend, something that a grandparent might tell their grandchild. I wonder how it would sound if you experimented with writing it in the first person, so just making that small change from Bruno to: "Nessa época, quando ninguém parecia se importar com nada, meu pai me presenteou com um pé de coelho..." As it is, the story feels very close to the main character, so why not make it even closer? :) I feel the spirit of Mary Shelley and Clarice Lispector in the story, especially with the wonderfully gory ending.
I'm not sure if it's just my interpretation or a problem with the translation, but I had a sense that maybe the grandfather had stolen the original rabbit's foot and replaced it with one that was not so lucky. It would be a nice twist if that was the case! The story is vivid and clear. I wonder what Paulo Coelho would say :) Thanks for sharing your work with us and for your participation in the forums. I hope you'll keep revisiting the course. Un abrazo desde Madrid!
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Docent Plus@aolivver Hi Júlia, I enjoyed reading the story. It has the flavour of an urban legend, something that a grandparent might tell their grandchild. I wonder how it would sound if you experimented with writing it in the first person, so just making that small change from Bruno to: "Nessa época, quando ninguém parecia se importar com nada, meu pai me presenteou com um pé de coelho..." As it is, the story feels very close to the main character, so why not make it even closer? :) I feel the spirit of Mary Shelley and Clarice Lispector in the story, especially with the wonderfully gory ending.
I'm not sure if it's just my interpretation or a problem with the translation, but I had a sense that maybe the grandfather had stolen the original rabbit's foot and replaced it with one that was not so lucky. It would be a nice twist if that was the case! The story is vivid and clear. I wonder what Paulo Coelho would say :) Thanks for sharing your work with us and for your participation in the forums. I hope you'll keep revisiting the course. Un abrazo desde Madrid!
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